Let's talk about risk. Are you risk averse or risk loving? Do you dive into new experiences or do you hesitate? Are you afraid of the unknown? Well, most people are risk averse or in other words avoid risk and that's probably not surprising to you considering that as human beings our primary survival strategy is to avoid potentially dangerous situations. BUT THE BIGGEST RISK YOU CAN TAKE IS NOT TAKING RISK AT ALL.What the hell does that mean you ask? It's simple, if you want to improve your dating life the one thing that will completely insure that you fail miserably and stay stuck is if you don't take risks. Every month I teach a 2 hour introductory workshop where I map out my patented system for success with women. I call it the FLOCK system: F=FUNdamentals L=Lifestyle O=Opening Powerfully C=Connection K=Keep Her/Them At the workshop I hammer home the F (FUNdamentals). One of the most important FUNdamentals is the distinction between the Confident vs. the Unsure man. If we look at the difference, we realize that Confident men make commitments to their bigger vision and trust themselves to make things happen, while unsure men leave their life up to chance and avoid risk. The law of attraction rewards you for stepping into the unknown and committing to things outside your comfort zone. I'll prove it. Think of the last time you invested in yourself. Maybe you attended college or a seminar or some other workshop that gave you the tools to improve a certain area of your life. Did you have the cash laying around or did you stress a little before taking the plunge because you weren't sure if you could afford it. You were on the fence about it but you saw the impact this investment could have on your life so you went ahead and took the risk and forked over the cash. What happened? A) You found a way to pay for it and everything worked out great. B) You decided to cancel or ask for a refund because the investment wasn't what you were expecting. C) You ended up in financial ruin and regretted your decision. If ANYONE OUT THERE can honestly convince me that C happened to THEM, I will be shocked. There is one disclaimer though. The law of attraction states that what you focus on expands. So if you invest in something that isn't a good fit for you, it won't work. For example, if your parents invested in college for you and you only went because they pressured you, chances are you don't really remember all that much or got as much value out of your experience to make the $100,000 they paid worthwhile. If you can prove me wrong, leave a comment and I'll send you a free copy of my ebook. But be prepared to back up your claims!! Let me tell you about the saddest thing I see in this business and it's probably not what you are expecting. I get a lot of repeat students at these 2 hour intro seminars. Some of these guys come to the same exact event month after month but never sign up for the deeper transformational training I offer. They hang around after the workshop is over and talk to the other guys about this or that and ask me a few questions here and there. I always hear the same three things. "I would sign up for your workshop but I can't afford it, I don't have enough time, or I'm probably gonna sign up but I have to think about it." 97% of the guys that think about it, don't sign up. I totally understand if guys don't wanna sign up for my programs because they fail to see the value and don't think it can help them, but I'm not talking about those guys. I'm talking about the guys who come to event after event and still don't sign up. When I see these guys, I know how badly they want it to improve their inner confidence, but they aren't willing to take the risk, make the financial or time commitment and trust themselves to work out the rest. These guys will never improve because chances are if they don't action here, they won't do it anywhere else. And if they finally bite the bullet and do it, they wasted months and months stressing over it. So here is my guarantee: If you want something bad enough, commit to it and don't look back. I promise you will find a way to make everything work out. The only proof I can provide is the $100,000+ dollars I've invested in myself and the return its given me in spades. That and I guarantee you, every self made millionaire on this planet will agree with me 100%. Some very insightful people said these things and they were dead on: "If you let anything stop you, you are stoppable." "Where there's a will there's a way." Here's what I have to say... "Don't be a pussy!" :) -Robbie
Inner Confidence
Saturday, 27 November 2010
Saturday, 20 November 2010
Inner Confidence
Have you ever gone out to a bar with the goal of getting a phone number, a kiss or having a great interaction?
If you're answer is "no" then I know you are a liar! We've all been there and you may be wondering, "What's wrong with doing that?"
Well, there's nothing wrong with that but when we set a goal and it doesn't happen, most of us beat ourselves up and decide to try harder next time.
Next time rolls around and since we have decided to try harder, we make the goal even tougher and push ourselves even more.
It doesn't happen and we beat ourselves up again.
This is a major mistake guys make that crushes their inner game because it turns into a vicious circle.
Pretty soon you're having no fun, getting no results, and your inner confidence starts getting worse.
The problem is not that we suck, the problem is that our goals suck!
Key Point: Your goals must be measurable and achievable with certainty.
You can approach every woman in the bar or the party but you can't set the goal to get a date because you can't force someone to say yes.
What other people do isn't under your control!
But whats absolutely under your control is what you do.
You can set the goal to ask 5 women for dates because you can control it. All you have to do is ask.
When you set your goals on things you can control, you set yourself up for success because you can guarantee yourself a win
So how can you set your goals so that their absolutely under your control and are fun?
Here is my goal setting process:
1. Ask yourself what you want.
2. See if it's measurable.
3. Determine how realistic it is.
4. Make sure it involves fun.
5. Make sure it pushes your comfort zone a little but not too much.
Example:
1. I want to go out and talk to women.
2. Oops, that is not measurable, let's say 5 women.
3. Is it realistic? 5 might be too many. Let's say 2 instead.
4. Is it gonna be fun? It will be fun if they are friendly. Wait, I can't control if they are going to be friendly so that is a bad goal. What do I want instead? I want to talk to 2 women and I want them to like me. I can't control that either but I think I'll feel better if I am honest about that. OK, so I'm going to approach two women and tell them that I want them to like me. Ok that sounds like fun!
5. Actually, I think 2 women is slightly too easy, let's make it 3 women.
So I went out, approached 3 groups of women by walking over and saying "Hey, I don't know what to say to you, but I want you to like me."
The first group busted up and said "HAHA, that is the most honest thing I've heard tonight!"
The next group looked at me like I was retarded, and the last group loved me and we talked for 15 minutes.
Are you seeing how it works?
Set yourself up for success. If you can control your destiny, you will succeed.
You simply set a goal and you go out and make it happen. Nothing builds more inner confidence than taking action, getting results, feeling more confident and then repeating the pattern.
It all starts with the goals you set.
If you're answer is "no" then I know you are a liar! We've all been there and you may be wondering, "What's wrong with doing that?"
Well, there's nothing wrong with that but when we set a goal and it doesn't happen, most of us beat ourselves up and decide to try harder next time.
Next time rolls around and since we have decided to try harder, we make the goal even tougher and push ourselves even more.
It doesn't happen and we beat ourselves up again.
This is a major mistake guys make that crushes their inner game because it turns into a vicious circle.
Pretty soon you're having no fun, getting no results, and your inner confidence starts getting worse.
The problem is not that we suck, the problem is that our goals suck!
Key Point: Your goals must be measurable and achievable with certainty.
You can approach every woman in the bar or the party but you can't set the goal to get a date because you can't force someone to say yes.
What other people do isn't under your control!
But whats absolutely under your control is what you do.
You can set the goal to ask 5 women for dates because you can control it. All you have to do is ask.
When you set your goals on things you can control, you set yourself up for success because you can guarantee yourself a win
So how can you set your goals so that their absolutely under your control and are fun?
Here is my goal setting process:
1. Ask yourself what you want.
2. See if it's measurable.
3. Determine how realistic it is.
4. Make sure it involves fun.
5. Make sure it pushes your comfort zone a little but not too much.
Example:
1. I want to go out and talk to women.
2. Oops, that is not measurable, let's say 5 women.
3. Is it realistic? 5 might be too many. Let's say 2 instead.
4. Is it gonna be fun? It will be fun if they are friendly. Wait, I can't control if they are going to be friendly so that is a bad goal. What do I want instead? I want to talk to 2 women and I want them to like me. I can't control that either but I think I'll feel better if I am honest about that. OK, so I'm going to approach two women and tell them that I want them to like me. Ok that sounds like fun!
5. Actually, I think 2 women is slightly too easy, let's make it 3 women.
So I went out, approached 3 groups of women by walking over and saying "Hey, I don't know what to say to you, but I want you to like me."
The first group busted up and said "HAHA, that is the most honest thing I've heard tonight!"
The next group looked at me like I was retarded, and the last group loved me and we talked for 15 minutes.
Are you seeing how it works?
Set yourself up for success. If you can control your destiny, you will succeed.
You simply set a goal and you go out and make it happen. Nothing builds more inner confidence than taking action, getting results, feeling more confident and then repeating the pattern.
It all starts with the goals you set.
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